Let me preface this by saying that I, by no means, am an expert when it comes to love. I didn’t have an official boyfriend until I met my husband at 21 (at least, no one ever called me – or treated me like – their girlfriend), my first kiss was when I was 18 and before those things, I mainly fantasized about 90’s rock stars. With that said, my husband and I often get asked what makes our relationship work, so I figured I would make it the topic of my next Being Melificent post.
The hubs and I have been together for 11 years now, with nearly 6 of those as husband and wife. During our time together so far, I have come to view the following as some reasons we have stood the test of time and see no end to our little love affair:
1. It’s the little things; this tends to be my motto overall, but I really think it is what can make or break a relationship. At least here in Miami, people can be so superficial (i.e., If he didn’t get you a 2 karat engagement ring, it’s time to kick him to the curb). Learn to focus on what is really important in a relationship (and life): moments, the way something made you feel – NOT material things. A perfect example are weddings. People get so caught up in the details, color schemes and chivari chairs, that they forget to focus on their LOVE for one another. Honestly, my top 5 weddings have made it onto the list mainly because you can feel the love radiating through the entire event, not because their centerpieces cost them thousands. One of the memories I cherish the most involving the hubs is a night we were listening to Silverchair’s Across the Night as we were cleaning, and he spontaneously whipped me around and starting slow dancing with me all around the house. Hold on to those, remember those, not the number of gifts he has given you. None of that matters in the end.
2. We still date; this is so important to me! My husband and I have never stopped dating each other. We try to plan a date a week where we go try/discover something new in or around our city. Harkening back on #1, it doesn’t have to be anything fancy, as long as we are together. It keeps the relationship from getting stagnant and monotonous, and instead brings back the romance, excitement and FUN. So instead of spending Saturday afternoon on the couch watching reruns of Sex & the City while you are both sitting next to each other, but independently Internet surfing, go out and explore together. I promise having that one-on-one time on a frequent basis will remind you of why you fell in love with this person in the first place!