Melificent

Thirty Something.

This past weekend I turned thirty___.
At this point in my life, I feel like I actually have learned quite a few things (I often don’t feel any wiser).

  • Speak up, don’t stay quiet.
    • When I was younger (i.e., just a couple of months ago), I was very meek. And quiet. I let things slide. I have realized that in order to get what you want and make your voice heard, you need to use it. This often gets women labeled “a bitch,” but I will gladly take that title if it means I have an opinion, a stance and can defend myself.
  • There is no timeline for anything. Live your life at your pace.
    • I’m not sure if this is the case with other cultures, but I know for the Hispanic culture, we are often pressured to do x by x age. That is sure to be the death of you. Don’t let anyone dictate your journey or what you should be doing while you are on it. You don’t have to do anything. Knowing this has been so liberating. I am no longer part of the flock, which is a perfect seque into the next lesson…
  • BE YOURSELF. Don’t try to conform for anyone.
    • A lot of times we are forced into certain little boxes of how we should act and be. That is nonsense. Be yourself and you will see a difference. I would often hide the true me, but now I embrace it. It has brought me so much positivity and love. I feel more at peace that I am being true to myself and do not feel the need to change for anyone.
  • Do what makes you happy. Put YOU first.
    • This is something that I have known for quite some time, but it made itself known again this year. Do not feel like you are stuck. You have the power to change anything and everything. I just did recently, and I feel like a brand new person. Don’t wait to be happy or just settle. You are better than that. Your soul will thank you.
  • Surround yourself with people that get it.
    • This also may be an obvious one, but it really isn’t. You don’t HAVE to spend time with people you do not like or do not bring something to your life. I don’t have a lot of free time anymore, and I think that prompted me to really think about who I was giving that precious time to. I have surrounded myself with a bunch of amazing people that are supportive, intelligent and make me want to be better. Tightening my social circle has made a world of a difference.

 

And finally, my own personal quote for this year:

“If you listen to people, you won’t live.” – Taraji P. Henson

Comments

  1. That first one… I had to learn the hard way. Girls who are shy and quiet tend to get brushed aside. I had to be “a bitch” to get people to listen to me and to stand up for myself.

    I love this kind of list though. It’s a wonderful feeling knowing you’ve learned about yourself and to pass on that wisdom. Happy belated birthday Meli!

    Megan // ageekygal.com

  6. Amen!!! YES YES and YES to everything!! I can personally relate to the hispanic culture deadline and the relationship circle and glad that I am able to count on you as a friend!! And yes my friend you are very wiseee <3

  8. So much yes to this. Lots of this I learned with Tony Robbins and guidance growing up. It’s so funny how many folks really try to impose THEIR timeline to YOUR life and it infects folks to believing that they need to live their life by their timeline. Ridiculous! I definitely feel that with the lst point of surrounding yourself with people that get it is the key to success because they’re only going to push you forward and believe in you (hopefully). Remove the toxic and let in the healthy relationships.

  10. Amen!!! Especially to the first two. I have to remind myself I have voice and I need / should be using it and I don’t need to follow a timeline for anything!

    My family is notorious for pushing timelines and I’m over here like the black sheep of familia.

Trackbacks

  1. […] a very disheartening societal truth that I briefly touched on in my birthday post: if a woman defends herself or speaks her truth, she is a bitch. She, apparently, is a bully. Was I […]

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *