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Humans are social animals, and as such, we interact with people daily. Therefore the potential for embarrassment always looms. Yet the things we get embarrassed about the most are the things we cannot help, most of the time. Embarrassing things that almost everyone does, such as burping out loud, happen every day. Yet, the level of embarrassment depends on where and when such events occur. At home, who cares? The elevator at work. Good Lord.
An Impromptu Tattoo
You’ve seen the TV shows where people get a silly tattoo while on holiday. Many people who get a tattoo end up regretting it, yet some generations enjoy theirs more. Millennials, for example, are the current record holders. Over 40% of Millennials have a tattoo. Probably due to the Hipster Apocalypse and celebrity influence. Tattoos themselves aren’t a bad thing, but there are bad tattoo artists. And the world is full of botched jobs.
Tattoos are meant to be permanent. But you can have them removed if you wish. It is a commonly held belief that lasers are required, but you can undergo a no laser tattoo removal process. There are various methods in addition to lasers, including surgery, dermabrasion, and salabrasion. You can also try natural approaches like honey, aloe vera, and lemon solutions.
The Nip Slip
A pulp celebrity magazine favorite, the nip slip paparazzi photo goes back a long way. A socialite drunk stumbling from a limo. A tennis player is slamming one home. Or a pop star is performing at the Superbowl. Sometimes, a boob just pops out. Although the validity of Janet Jackson’s incident is still fiercely debated.
This might have happened to you. The embarrassment can be mortifying depending on where and when it happened. At the office, oh dear God, no. But at the swimming pool, it’s to be expected. Yet, there is nothing to be embarrassed about. Is there anyone alive with the ability to defy gravity? Of course not. If you are genuinely terrified of this happening, wear sports or a tight bra and layer up.
Cutting the Cheese
The world seems to have a big problem with one of the most fundamental biological processes that we have no control over. When you eat food, gases build in the stomach, and this needs to be released. Yes, you fart. So what? What’s the big deal? It’s not polite to do it deliberately at work or in someone’s home. But there’s nothing you can do about it, really.
Medically, it is not recommended to hold it in. Obviously, an office meeting isn’t the best time, and you can hold it for a while. But if you don’t eventually release, you are susceptible to severe conditions. These include:
- Colon irritation
- Stomach pains
- Bowel discomfort
- Stomach bloating
- Indigestion
- Heartburn and acid
- Nausea and vomiting
- Constipation and diarrhea
Yet you can reduce the chances of excessive gas with some simple changes. First, you can reduce fats, proteins, lactose, and fiber. You can also eat slower, quit smoking, and exercise more frequently.
Accidental Crotch Grab
Remember that hilarious scene from the classic sitcom Friends? The one where Rachel goes for a handshake and grabs something else, following landing a new job. Well, it’s actually pretty common to accidentally touch someone in a private area. A mistimed handshake will land at the crotch, and you can never tell when boobs are going to get in the way.
This can be highly embarrassing for both parties involved, and a good man will be left mortified if he accidentally touches a woman inappropriately. The best course of action is to apologize, laugh it out and never speak of it again. But, of course, if inappropriate touching frequently occurs in a grabbing manner, there could be more to it, and it might be best to inform someone.
Paste Face
There are those among us who love nothing more than cheerily jumping out of bed, ready to start the day afresh. And some take several hours to wake up, during which time they slowly come to life like an evolving early human. But whichever you are, it’s almost guaranteed you have pasted your face before leaving for work in the morning.
No one knows why this happens. It just does. It’s as mysterious as the forming of a black hole. But the hilarious thing about accidentally getting toothpaste on your face is that no one ever tells you it’s there! So you can go about your day, from the minute you leave home to the time you get back, and it will still be there. Socially acceptable sadism at its best.
Asking the Due Date
Perhaps a touchy subject and one that women are all too familiar with. Maybe you’ve been enjoying larger than usual lunches. Maybe you have put on a few pounds over the holidays, or perhaps you just have a cute little pot belly. There’s no shame in any of these. But how infuriating it is when someone asks when your baby is due. The cheek of it.
However, this sort of question shouldn’t even be socially acceptable. Even if someone is pregnant, asking for a due date is considered impolite. Furthermore, anything concerning pregnancy is highly personal to a woman. So, unless you are a very close friend or family member, it’s probably best not to ask this question. And it could be considered not safe for work.
Self Aggrandizing
Once considered the domain of the narcissist, self-aggrandizing is a tricky social game to play. Unless you are very good at lying, which most people are not, you should try your best not to do this. If you aren’t sure what this is, it simply makes you appear more important than you are. The dinner party is a prime example of a setting where self-aggrandizing takes place.Yet, the way the world has changed since the invention of social media means this practice is expected. There is a considerable amount of pressure in the modern world. This pressure almost implores us to self-aggrandize a little bit when meeting new people. So it’s common when attending a gathering or being asked about what we do for a living. Just don’t do it too much as people will see through it.
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